I’ve been thinking about writing this post for a long time. I’ve actually started 3 times and failed, so maybe this 4^th time will be a winner. Tonight, my computer decided that instead of connecting to my wifi network that clearly exists (evidenced by smartphone AND smart TV), it will pretend that the network has disappeared. I could go into this dance where I unplug the cords to the wall upstairs, wait a whole 15 seconds (OK let’s be honest, it’s usually more like 7), and then search longingly for the network name and restart the computer. In the end I would inevitably curse the God I never really believed in for punishing me nonsensically for this very unfair first-world problem. But I thought that, instead, I might use this rare opportunity to suppress my internet-induced ADD and finally sit down and tell you all (yes, all 2.5 people who will read this) what the hell I’m doing with my life. Right after I watch this cat video… oh curse you, internet-induced Alzheimers!

Much like the Avengers, we are clumsily bouncing off to another world for selfish purposes.

OK so a lot of hypothetical people have been asking me recently: “Patrice, what do you want to do with your life?” To them, my hypothetical answer is this: “That is the wrong question, grasshopper. Rather, I will answer your hypothetical real question with another question: how do I want to live?” So meta, amiright?

I have two choices: I can live in the US with a relatively good salary, build a career, get 2 weeks of vacation per year, and hope to travel more later, essentially going down the path that a lot of people are really happy with. It usually involves babies, building equity, traditional holidays, obligatory overpriced parking, the occasional trip to Europe if I’m lucky, and living in a bubble. Sometimes, when I hear about others my age or younger who are enjoying going down that path successfully, I wonder what my life would be like if I had decided that it was for me. I get a little sad, and then I remember my other option, the one I have chosen: I can live abroad on a very comfortable salary for the location, have 2 months of vacation per year, constantly be stimulated by new foods/smells/people/language/culture, see my family once or twice for a quality week per year, and be where I want to be. (I really tried not to make the second choice seem so much like the obvious one, but I also acknowledge that my bias is palpable.) Buying a house while knowing just how unstable the market is, and making babies, which may not happen, aren’t exactly at the top of my priority list. I will probably continue to build credit, but the prospect of owning more things – a nicer car, a bigger house, a fancy stroller – is not what gets me out of bed in the morning. What gets me out of bed? Why, seeing the world, of course! Popping that bubble, getting uncomfortable, and growing my world, of course! That’s what I live for and how I do it is through option #2.

I don’t know why that’s the most important thing to me, but now that I know and understand it, I have to follow it. I have to harness the energy and passion I have for learning more about my world, focus it into a little ball, and learn to control that ball, much like Harry Potter with the snitch. I don’t know where it’s going to lead, but this is the path that I know I have to take.

So. For those of you who don’t know, Seth and I are currently working through the process of getting our work visas so that we can teach at an international school in China. Hence the revamped blog. Right now, that’s our only solid plan: get to China, and don’t forget the cats. How long will we stay? Maybe 2 years, maybe 5 – I don’t know, but it doesn’t matter. We just won’t be coming back permanently; rather we are making a decision to be expats for life, or as long as we can. There, I said it! We leave in January. I will be updating this blog with our experiences living abroad  (version 2.0), and traveling, of course.

To the friends, coworkers, bosses, new and old family members, and other cool people I’ve met here in the US in the past 3 years since we came back from Korea, or the past 5 years since we left for Korea, or you know, people I know in general: I hope you don’t feel like I don’t care about you. I care a lot about all the people I meet (some more than others) but please know that my friendliness has never been disingenuous  – I would love to keep in touch with all of you and see you again. Such is the life of an expat: friends come and go geographically, but you can try to maintain friendships. Whenever I say goodbye to people, I like to also add this: no matter if you reach out in a year, 10 years, or 50, I will always be happy to hear from you, and you will always have a couch (or maybe even a guest bed!) at my place. And I know it goes both ways! Don’t worry. You don’t have to tell me yourself. No really – I will just assume. Shhh quiet now: stop trying to correct me, you’re not thinking straight, it’s the grief. Bye now!

(But seriously let’s hang out before I go!)